Feedback: Why it matters

Welcome to a new series of resources from OSCPA and Applegate Talent Strategies LLC. Over the coming months, you’ll have access to this specialized content designed to help you lead, manage and transform your teams.  

Distinguishing between performance issues and personal preferences ensures your feedback is clear, credible and taken seriously.  

What made sense then  

Many leaders gave feedback as if all feedback carried the same weight. If something bothered you—whether it was a missed deadline or a quirky habit—you told the person so they could “improve.” It felt fair and thorough: you were keeping standards high across the board.  

Why it falls short today  

Not all feedback is created equal. When you treat a true performance issue the same way you treat a personal preference, you blur the lines for your team. Performance feedback addresses objective, measurable behaviors that harm results—missed deadlines, repeated errors or damaging customer interactions. Preference feedback, on the other hand, is subjective—it reflects your tastes, habits or style (fonts, fragrance, phrasing). Mixing them sends the wrong signal: people may overreact to minor preferences or underreact to critical issues. And if you fire someone over a personal preference, you’re likely making a costly mistake.  

What works now  

Before giving feedback, ask yourself: Is this performance or preference? If it’s performance, the stakes are high—be clear about the impact, expectations and consequences. If it’s preference, share it as a perspective, not a mandate. This distinction will help you choose the right tone, approach and outcome while keeping your credibility intact.  

Action  

For leaders of leaders 

Model the distinction in your own feedback. Then, coach your managers to label their feedback before delivering it: “This is a performance issue” vs. “This is my preference.”  

For leaders of teams  

The next time you’re going to deliver feedback, state upfront which type it is. If it’s performance related, clearly link it to business impact. If it’s preference-based, frame it as optional and be open about explaining why it matters to you and hearing what the other person thinks.  

For yourself 

Review the last three pieces of feedback you gave. Which were performance-based? Which were preference-based? How would you frame the feedback differently to be better received?  

Learn more  

For a deeper dive, read two competing perspectives on feedback, The Feedback Fallacy and What Good Feedback Really Looks Like from Harvard Business Review (limited free articles—subscription may be required). Listen to The Essentials: Giving Feedback from HBR’s Women at Work podcast with advice on how to get better at this tough but critical skill.